Are The Vultures Waiting For You?

798px-AmericanBlackVultureFlock

This morning on the way to church we passed a cow pasture near our home. As we rounded the corner we saw about 30 or 40 vultures on the ground near a large black bull. The bull was lying down but still alive and for whatever reason the vultures could sense that his end was probably near.

This sight was a hard thing to explain to my kids.

The bull was reduced from his former glory to this. Once he had the run of the herd, now he’s surrounded by creatures waiting to divide him up. If this wasn’t enough of an indignity, one of the vultures had even decided to stand on the bull’s back to wait for his demise.

In a way we’re all going to end up like this bull one day. All the things we poured our lives into obtaining, will be divided up. All our efforts at success, all our striving towards the trappings that go with our consumer culture will mean nothing at the end.

The biblical Solomon put it this way:

So I became great and surpassed all who were before me in Jerusalem. Also my wisdom remained with me. And whatever my eyes desired I did not keep from them. I kept my heart from no pleasure, for my heart found pleasure in all my toil, and this was my reward for all my toil. Then I considered all that my hands had done and the toil I had expended in doing it, and behold, all was vanity and a striving after wind, and there was nothing to be gained under the sun. – Ecclesiastes 2:9-11 ESV

Into what are you pouring your efforts? Is it eternal or vanity?

My Ghostly Visitor

Wilfred Edward Salter Owen, M.C.

Thursday, March 18th was the poet Wilfred Owen’s birthday. For many years I have paused on March 18 to remember him and the influence he and his work have had on my life. In a way, he has become a ghostly visitor to me every March.

The story behind my fondness for Owen comes from a very difficult and dark time in my life. I am a PTSD survivor. I ended up suffering with PTSD due to my days in law enforcement. For some time I struggled the the depression that comes from PTSD. I was very fortunate to have a supportive family and friends. I was also fortunate to be in a position to embark on the long  journey through my illness to a place of relative wellness.

During the time that my struggles with PTSD were dark and terrifying, I tried to learn everything I could about it. I poured myself into studying this illness. At this same time, Owen’s poetry took on a new profundity for me. Owen had been a soldier during World War 1. Due to his war experiences, Owen had been diagnosed with what they called at the time “shell shock”. Shell Shock is what we now know as PTSD.

Owen’s best work was written during the time he was convalescing at the Craiglockhart War Hospital. The poems of his experiences deeply resonate with me and my experiences as a police officer. In a way, Owen has come to represent this part of my life.

Wilfred Owen did not survive the war. One week before the Armistice, he was killed in battle.

Wilfred Owen's Grave

I look forward to my ghostly visit again next year. Rest in peace old friend.

Man’s Best Friend

Open Arms For The Broken

Jesus

I spent the day with someone who’s in the middle of a divorce while they went through the legal process to end their marriage. The process was long, draining and emotional. No one goes into their marriage thinking theirs will end in divorce. Yet, many marriages do including those of many Christians. Even if the divorce was necessary, it still sucks. No one wins.

While I wandered around downtown Austin waiting for the parts of the process I could not be present for to be completed, I found this statute outside of St. Mary’s Church. The statue of Jesus struck me. Because in spite of the pain I had been witnessing in an office building nearby, this same Jesus holds his arms open wide for all of us sinners. He wants us to come to him, especially when we are broken and wounded.

Some Things Aren’t As Easy As They Look

I tried this…

But since I didn’t have a fast, crotch rocket motorcycle I had to use my bicycle.

Needless to say, it didn’t turn out so well.

No Fun, Just Mental

Mark Driscoll at his best.

Rube Goldberg Machine

This is a cool video. There is also a great article over at Wired that talks about how it was produced. There are also some behind the scenes videos in the story.

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